What’s Holding You Back – 3 Tips to Break Through
If you feel something is holding you back, you could be doing it to yourself. Here are three ways to overcome what’s holding you back.

What’s Holding You Back – 3 Tips to Break Through

Often we feel like we could achieve more if we could just break through the barriers in front of us. A lot of times though we’re the ones placing those barriers. If you feel something is holding you back, you could be doing it to yourself. Here are three ways to overcome what’s holding you back.

What’s Holding You Back – Fear of Failure

One of the biggest things that holds us back is fear of failure or fear of rejection. What we often forget is that failure is often one of our best teachers. Fear of rejection and fear of failure has been a recurring theme in my life. It showed up in my business where I wouldn’t go out and actively ask people to be my clients. I was afraid they would say no and that kept me from asking. The first step was to stop worrying about it and make the ask. I don’t want to give the impression that this has completely gone away. These fears still stick with me sometimes and I must dig deep to find courage sometimes, but it does get easier.

If you’re holding yourself back because of fear of failure of rejection, it’s important to go make that ask, Be polite and professional to the person you are asking. If they say no, it’s not personal and has more to do with them than you. And if anyone takes real offense, they were probably not the right person for you to go forward with anyway.

What’s Holding You Back – Not Asking For Help

A lot of times we don’t ask for help because we’re afraid of being judged or of being vulnerable in front of someone we respect. When I started my company, I was afraid that people wouldn’t think I was good at running a business if I asked for help. But there were skills like marketing and sales that I needed some help with. Twenty years in the Air Force didn’t prepare me for those aspects of business. And the only way I was going to learn was to ask for help. I asked for help and improved my business.

If you feel like you need help in a certain area, the best thing you can do is ask someone. Most people want to help others when they can. Just about everyone loves sharing their expertise if we have reasonable expectations for them. If you need help, find someone knowledgeable and ask specific questions about your problem. Apply their advice and see what results come about for you.

What’s Holding You Back – Negative Self-Talk

The stories that we tell ourselves about who we are and the world around us have a great deal of influence over our attitudes and behavior. Our imaginations are very powerful and can serve us well, but they can also run away from us. Many people tell themselves, “I’m not good enough”, “I’ll never be able to do that” or “I don’t belong here”. I engaged in this kind of negative self-talk for many years. This created beliefs that strained the relationships in both my personal and professional life.

If you tell yourself these kinds of negative stories, you can remedy the situation by separating facts from beliefs. What worked for me was taking a piece of paper and making 2 columns, one for beliefs and one for facts. I wrote down the beliefs I had held on to for so many years and then the facts that went along with that situation. What I found out was that when I looked at the cold hard facts on paper in front of me, the beliefs and feelings I had for so long just could not be supported by the facts.

I will be honest with you, getting past these barriers is not easy. It doesn’t change overnight and still takes a conscious effort. If you feel like you’re being held back look at these three areas and see if you’re the one holding yourself back instead of some outside force. Give these tips a try. Even if they don’t unlock whatever problem you’re facing right away, I promise that you’ll feel better about yourself.

Employee motivation is a challenge for every leader. So how do we get our team members to do things that need to be done without being told?

Employee Motivation

One of the reasons we wanted to become leaders was so that we could take on challenges we couldn’t achieve by ourselves. Employee motivation is a challenge for every leader. So how do we get our team members to do things that need to be done without being told?

This week we’re answering a question from Pete. He says, “One thing I’m dealing with right now is trying to motivate people who don’t show initiative.”  To help Pete out with this issue, I’m going to give 4 tips for employee motivation.

Employee Motivation Tip #1 – Understand the Psychology

First, it’s important to remember the psychology of motivation. We need to understand the concepts of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. Everyone is both extrinsically and intrinsically motivated to some degree. Extrinsic motivation is motivation by external rewards, whether that’s money, a bonus, time off or whatever the individual desires. Intrinsic motivation is the rewards that comes internally from feeling the satisfaction of doing a job well done. As a leader, you need to understand how each of your team members is motivated and in what proportion. This will require getting to know each team member! Once you know what makes them tick, you can use that knowledge to your advantage when applying the other three tips.

Employee Motivation Tip #2 – Appeal to Intrinsic Motivation

Taking advantage of intrinsic motivation is tricky. You now know more about your team, their hopes and dreams, likes and dislikes. You can use that information to get excite them. Everyone has something they want to see done better in their workplace. Encourage your team members to talk about improvements they would like to see. When you overhear them talking to each other, challenge them to follow through on their ideas.

Employee Motivation Tip #3 – Use Your Resources

To use extrinsic motivation, Use the resources you have. You may not have money for bonuses, but almost every organization has a recognition program. If you don’t, create one. Make initiative a heavily weighted criteria when giving out awards if you can. Get creative. Time off, work from home, flexible schedules, whatever you can think of. Remember, that to incentivize any behavior, the incentive structure has to match what you say you value. If you want to incentivize initiative, recognition and rewards have to reflect that. You can’t give out awards for BLANK and not recognize the people who took initiative to try to make positive change.

Employee Motivation Tip #4 – Build a Culture

Finally, and probably most importantly, we need to be sure that we are setting up a culture on our team that fosters and rewards initiative. This requires some honest introspection on our part as the leader. When our team members show initiative, how do we react? Our reactions, both conscious and subconscious, verbal and non-verbal have a lot to do with how our team will behave in the future. Patience and open-mindedness are key here. If their work is acceptable but not the way you prefer it was done, you have to find ways to build on their work without shutting it down.

If we want our team members to show initiative we have to show them that their efforts won’t be wasted. We need to get to know them as people and what makes them tick. As leaders we have to encourage them to follow-up on their ideas and we also need to use our resources to recognize and reward them appropriately. Most important we need to show that we are open to the things that they show initiative on. Even if it’s not the most important thing on our list or the outcome isn’t perfect.  We must appreciate our team members’ effort if we want them to show initiative. Keep doing that and your team members will keep taking on new challenges without you having to ask them to!

Lately we’ve heard a lot about how practicing gratitude can benefit our lives as well as those around us. I know from personal experience that being grateful for the things we have can be difficult. It’s hard to focus on gratitude when we’re overwhelmed with everything that life throws at us. That’s why it’s important to bring gratitude to the front of our mind with a daily practice. Making time for this practice and will help us develop a strong habit until it's second nature to us.

Practicing Gratitude

Thanksgiving is coming up this week and we all have a lot to be thankful for. Personally I’m thankful for my family, my friends, the great people I get to partner with on business ventures, and the nice life I have here in Las Vegas. Lately we’ve heard a lot about how practicing gratitude can benefit our lives as well as those around us. I know from personal experience that being grateful for the things we have can be difficult. It’s hard to focus on gratitude when we’re overwhelmed with everything that life throws at us. That’s why it’s important to bring gratitude to the front of our mind with a daily practice. Making time for this practice and will help us develop a strong habit until it’s second nature to us.

Practicing Gratitude: The Benefits

There are a lot of benefits to practicing gratitude. It makes us feel better about ourselves and it improves our relationships with other people. Amy Morin wrote in Psychology Today about 7 ways that gratitude benefits us:

  • Gratitude opens the door to more relationships

    Not only does saying “thank you” constitute good manners, but showing appreciation can help you win new friends, according to a 2014 study published in Emotion. The study found that thanking a new acquaintance makes them more likely to seek an ongoing relationship. So whether you thank a stranger for holding the door or send a thank-you note to that colleague who helped you with a project, acknowledging other people’s contributions can lead to new opportunities.

  • Gratitude improves physical health

    Grateful people experience fewer aches and pains and report feeling healthier than other people, according to a 2012 study published in Personality and Individual Differences. Not surprisingly, grateful people are also more likely to take care of their health. They exercise more often and are more likely to attend regular check-ups, which is likely to contribute to further longevity.

  • Gratitude improves psychological health

  • Gratitude reduces a multitude of toxic emotions, from envy and resentment to frustration and regret. Robert Emmons, a leading gratitude researcher, has conducted multiple studies on the link between gratitude and well-being. His research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.
  • Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression

    Grateful people are more likely to behave in a pro-social manner, even when others behave less kindly, according to a 2012 study by the University of Kentucky. Study participants who ranked higher on gratitude scales were less likely to retaliate against others, even when given negative feedback. They experienced more sensitivity and empathy toward other people and a decreased desire to seek revenge.

  • Grateful people sleep better

    Writing in a gratitude journal improves sleep, according to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being. Spend just 15 minutes jotting down a few grateful sentiments before bed, and you may sleep better and longer.

  • Gratitude improves self-esteem

    A 2014 study published in the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology found that gratitude increased athletes’ self-esteem, an essential component to optimal performance. Other studies have shown that gratitude reduces social comparisons. Rather than becoming resentful toward people who have more money or better jobs—a major factor in reduced self-esteem—grateful people are able to appreciate other people’s accomplishments.

  • Gratitude increases mental strength 

    For years, research has shown gratitude not only reduces stress, but it may also play a major role in overcoming trauma. A 2006 study published in Behavior Research and Therapy found that Vietnam War veterans with higher levels of gratitude experienced lower rates of post-traumatic stress disorder. A 2003 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that gratitude was a major contributor to resilience following the terrorist attacks on September 11. Recognizing all that you have to be thankful for —even during the worst times—fosters resilience.

Practicing Gratitude: One Method

Now that you know the benefits of gratitude it’s time to develop your own daily gratitude practice. What works for someone else, may not work for you. It’s important to set yourself up for success by choosing a routine that works for you. Rather than just provide a list, I’ll tell you about my daily practice. You can generate your own ideas from there.

My daily gratitude practice starts just about as soon as I wake up. After I take the dog out to play for a few minutes. I meditate in my favorite chair to get myself in a calm and open frame of mind. As soon as I’m done, before I even get up from the chair, I open my journal. I write down three things that I’m grateful for. Sometimes I’m grateful for the people in my life. It could be something I’ve learned, an experience, or that it’s a really nice day out. I follow-up what I’m grateful for with writing out some personal goals that would make today a really great day. After that I close my journal and start my day!

At the end of the day, write down three things that happened that were really amazing. Since I’m not perfect, I also write down at least one thing that I could have improved upon. I’ve been doing this for about two years now. It really helps me focus on what’s important instead of dwelling on little things that frustrate or annoy me.

Practicing Gratitude: Tips for Building Your Practice

Now that you have an example to work on, it’s time to go build your own gratitude practice. There’s a reason we call it practicing gratitude. It doesn’t happen automatically. Just like an athlete or musician who practices every day, we need to commit to our practice as well.

There are a few things to keep in mind whenever embarking on a new journey like this one. First, research tells us it takes most of us 45 to 60 days to build a habit. To experience the benefits of practicing gratitude, commit to practice through the new year until it becomes second nature. Also, a practice like this works best if we do it every day. If that seems overwhelming to you or hard to commit to, try starting with 3 days a week. Keep adding a day each week until you’re up to every day. Finally, building a habit also works best if we do our practice at the same time every day. If your schedule is highly variable, blocking out time each day can help build the habit too.

Practicing gratitude is a great way to find more peace and build stronger relationships with the people in our lives. It’s challenging develop a daily practice, but there are techniques we can use to set ourselves up for success. Even though practicing gratitude isn’t always easy, the benefits that come from putting the time in are worth the effort.

We’re getting to know ourselves better this month at Evil Genius Leadership and today we’re going to talk about personality testing, as well as personality types. There are a lot of different personality tests and a lot of opinions about personality testing in leadership development. Today we’ll look at how to use personality types to know ourselves better, as well as improve our relationships with other people.

Personality Types

We’re getting to know ourselves better this month at Evil Genius Leadership and today we’re going to talk about personality testing, as well as personality types. There are a lot of different personality tests and a lot of opinions about personality testing in leadership development. Today we’ll look at how to use personality types to know ourselves better, as well as improve our relationships with other people.

Personality Types and Personality Tests

Learning our personality type is a great way to get to know ourselves better while developing our leadership style. There are a lot of personality tests that can help us find out more. You can go online and find Meyers-Briggs tests, Big 5 tests, Color type tests, almost anything you can think of. Most of these tests use personality archetypes from Jungian psychology. If you’re looking for a free online test, you can go to psychcentral.com. Also, the personality trait definitions below are from their site.

Personality Types and Traits

When you take a personality test, you will find that most of these tests will show you how you score on a continuum of traits. The areas vary from test to test, but they’re almost always a combination of five traits: Extraversion, Agreeableness, Conscientiousness, Neuroticism and Openness to Experience. Some tests may organize traits differently; for example, Meyers-Briggs tests align the traits on 4 continuums, but tell you the same information.

The 5 Personality Traits

  • Extraversion reflects a person’s preference for certain kinds of social situations, and how they like to behave in such situations. People high in extraversion are energetic and seek out the company of others. People low in extraversion — what some might call introverts — tend to be more quiet and reserved.
  • Agreeableness describes how we tend to interact with others, especially in terms of our altruism and friendliness. People who score higher in agreeableness tend to be more trusting, friendly and cooperative than others. People who score lower tend to be more aggressive and less cooperative.
  • Conscientiousness is how organized and persistent a person is in pursuing their goals. People who score high on this trait tend to be more methodical, well-organized and dutiful than others. People who score lower tend to be less careful, less focused and more likely to be distracted from tasks.
  • Neuroticism shows the tendency for a person to experience negative thoughts and feelings. People who score high on this trait tend to be more prone to insecurity and emotional distress. People who score lower tend to be more relaxed, less emotional and less prone to distress.
  • Openness to Experience indicates a person’s open-mindedness, and interest in culture and art. People who score high on this trait tend to be imaginative, creative, and to seek out cultural and educational experiences. People who score lower on this trait tend to be more down-to-earth, less interested in art and more practical in nature.

Interpreting Personality Test Results

Personality tests give you a score which will tell you how extroverted you are; how agreeable, etc. Looking at these scores together will give you an idea of how your personality traits work together to make you who you are. If your results don’t seem like they describe you accurately, ask someone who knows you really well to take a look. Sometimes it’s hard for us to accept our scores when we see them in black and white, but when someone we trust reminds us how we’ve approached life in the past, we can see a little more clearly.

In leadership, there’s no personality type or combination of traits that makes someone a better leader. Some research shows a very small correlation between extraversion and leadership ability, many of the greatest leaders in history would have qualified as introverts. So if you don’t score high on extraversion, you can still be a great leader.

Personality Types: Considerations for Ourselves and Others

The first thing to remember about personality types and personality tests is that they are not a psychological evaluation. They’re just a guide to give you some more understanding of your own personality. Next, it’s important that we use these tests to give us insight into our own personality and how we can grow to become great leaders. We shouldn’t put people in a box that limits their potential based on their personality type. It’s also important that we don’t use our personality type as an excuse to keep us in our comfort zone or let others on our team hide behind their personality type. I often hear  the excuse, “I’m not extroverted, I shouldn’t have to speak in public”. We shouldn’t let anyone, including ourselves, use this information as a crutch to avoid developing our skills.

I hope this gave you a little bit more insight into the traits that make up our personalities. We should never use this knowledge as an excuse for bad behavior or inaction. This helps us understand our resistance to doing what it takes to succeed. Just like we explored who we are, who we want to be and what we want out of life, knowing our personality type is another tool in our leadership toolbox that helps us know ourselves and develop our own unique leadership style.

The last fear that we're going to cover is the fear of saying no. I hate to tell people no, but sometimes we have to in order to get the best outcome.

Saying No: Facing Fear

All through October we’ve been talking about the things that frighten us and how to face them. The last common fear that we’re going to cover is the fear of saying no. We all have it. This is one that I have a particularly hard time with. I hate to tell people no, but sometimes we have to in order to get the best outcome.

Why is it so hard for us to say no to people? Often we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or we’re afraid they won’t like us anymore. Saying no to our boss comes with some concern about how it will affect our career. The likelihood that someone will stop being our friend just because we said no to them is actually pretty small. Our real friends will understand if we can’t say yes to what they’re asking for. When we explain our reasons, they’re usually pretty cool with it.

As human beings we have empathy for those around us and we don’t want to hurt others feelings. We should consider though, will we be hurting that person more if we DON’T say no in this case? And when it comes to saying no to our boss, we could actually be hurting our company, department or our boss even more by holding back.

Saying No Scenario #1 – Peers

Have you ever had one of your peers ask, “Do you think this is a good idea?” Sometimes it’s not a good idea. The extreme cases are actually a little easier. “I’m going to stand in a bucket of water and hold on to these electric cables, do you think that’s a good idea?” That’s pretty easy to say no to. When the request is a little more nuanced it can be difficult to say no to our peers. We want them to like us. We want them to think we’re a team player and we want them to like us! How do we say no when our teammate has an idea that is not in the best interest of the team?

One way is to look back at our mission. Does this idea fit into that mission? Is it in the best interest of the team, the customer or the people we’re trying to serve? If the answer is no, that can be the basis for how to say no. You don’t have to limit yourself to just saying no. Thoughtful feedback to your coworker can get their idea more aligned with team goals.

Saying No Scenario #2 – As a Leader

Saying no if you’re the boss can be harder than it looks. Especially if you used to be on the team and then were promoted to being the boss. Looking  someone you used to work with in the eye and telling them what to do can be challenging.  Sometimes the people on your team will take actions or have ideas that you need to say no to. Just like with our peers, keeping the mission and best interest of the team in mind will help. Avoid being arbitrary about whose ideas you listen to and whose you reject. We want to evaluate suggestions and solutions based on merit, not on who brings them forward.

Sometimes you have access to information about the big picture that you should take into account when making your decisions. You may or may not choose to share this information depending on the situation. Don’t forget that one of our duties as a leader is to develop our team, so when you have to say no, keep giving that feedback on how that individual can make their idea or suggestion better so you can say yes in the future.

Saying No Scenario #3 – To our Boss

If saying no to our peers and our team is hard, saying no to our boss can be downright impossible. We owe it to our boss to ensure they have complete information or understanding of the impacts of a decision. We can ask, is this in alignment with our mission and in the best interest of the team? A lot of times the answer is maybe. Sometimes we have to pick our battles. If the decision won’t cause catastrophic failure or isn’t a clear violation of laws or regulations, maybe we let it go. If there will be a serious breakdown in accomplishing the mission or a clear conflict of our organizational core values, it’s time to speak up.

A technique that we’ve talked about before is the one challenge rule. The boss makes a decision, you speak up once to make sure that the boss has all the information. If the boss decides to go forward anyway, you said your peace and aired your objection. This may not result in the decision you wanted, but at least you tried to help your boss and your team accomplish their mission.

Saying No with Dignity and Respect

These are just a few examples of times you might need to say no to someone, but the principles are the same. When we do say no to someone, whether it is our peers, our team or our boss, we always want to do it with respect and dignity. Coming from a place of fear or anger can distort our message and break down relationships instead of making them stronger. We should always strive to build better connections with the people, even if it means telling them no.

In this workshop, you will learn how to approach self, career, relationships and resources in a holistic way to enhance ALL of the aspects of your life. We will teach you how to leave behind the old attitudes and limiting self-talk that keep you from having what you really want in life.

Level Up Las Vegas! Workshop

Do you feel like there is something bigger for you?

Are you looking to live a full, vibrant life and you know that there is something holding you back?

Are stuck in a box with a certain aspect of your life and need to break out?

You have what it takes!  Sometimes all you need is someone to help show you how to do it.

In this workshop, you will learn how to approach self, career, relationships and resources in a holistic way to enhance ALL of the aspects of your life.  We will teach you how to leave behind the old attitudes and limiting self-talk that keep you from having what you really want in life.

JOIN US November 12th for a day of powerful PERSONAL DISCOVERY that will set you on the path to life you’ve always dreamed of!!

This event is an incredible value to spend an entire day with three experienced coaches for just $299. Sign up by October 31st and receive a $50 early bird discount on your admission.

Purchase tickets on EventBrite at:

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/level-up-las-vegas-tickets-28567710792.

Attendance is limited to 30 participants so sign up now!

Our three coaches for this event, Jason, Lisa and Robyn have made their own journeys by breaking through career, personal and financial obstacles and are dedicated to helping others live extraordinary lives.

If you have any questions, or are wondering if this workshop is right for you, feel free to schedule a 15 minute session with one of our coaches using the links below.

Meet the Level Up Las Vegas! Coaches:

Jason LeDuc is the Founder of Evil Genius Leadership Consultants and served proudly for two decades in the United States Air Force. He retired at the rank of Lieutenant Colonel in 2015. As an instructor at the Air War College Distance Learning Program he prepared 7000+ students to accept strategic leadership positions.

Jason LeDuc – Leadership Coach, Evil Genius Leadership Consultants

Jason LeDuc is the Founder of Evil Genius Leadership Consultants and served proudly for two decades in the United States Air Force. He retired at the rank of Lieutenant Colonel in 2015. As an instructor at the Air War College Distance Learning Program he prepared 7000+ students to accept strategic leadership positions.

Schedule an appointment with Jason at: https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=12838254

 

 

 

 

 

Lisa Chastain has spent over fifteen years advising and coaching people from all walks of life. Her current life passion is teaching others to create abundance in their life by taking control of their financial lives. Lisa has helped hundreds of people find purpose, passion and take control of their own destinies. She is the co-creator of Level Up and will be a co-facilitator as well. You can learn more about Lisa at www.linkedin.com/in/lisachastain.

Lisa Chastain – Lisa Chastain Coaching

Lisa Chastain has spent over fifteen years advising and coaching people from all walks of life.  Her current life passion is teaching others to create abundance in their life by taking control of their financial lives.  Lisa has helped hundreds of people find purpose, passion and take control of their own destinies.  She is the co-creator of Level Up and will be a co-facilitator as well.  You can learn more about Lisa at www.linkedin.com/in/lisachastain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Robyn Eckersley coaches clients around the country to build legacies of compassion and philanthropic impact. She loves working with motivated Changemakers who are ready to take on the challenge of making this world a better place! You can learn more about Robyn at www.robyn.coach. Robyn Eckersley – Robyn Eckersley Coaching

Robyn Eckersley coaches clients around the country to build legacies of compassion and philanthropic impact. She works with motivated Changemakers to take on the challenge of making this world a better place! Learn more about Robyn at www.robyn.coach.

Schedule an appointment with Robyn at: https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=12337521&appointmentType=2016960

Halloween is getting close and we’ve been exploring the things that scare us and trying to understand them. For some of us, going out and meeting new people can be really frightening.

Meeting New People: Facing Fear

Halloween is getting close and we’ve been exploring the things that scare us and trying to understand them. For some of us, going out and meeting new people can be really frightening. We get nervous and anxious just thinking about it. We might even start to shake or sweat when we are standing in front of that new person.

Just like we talked about with public speaking, there are very real reasons we get anxious about meeting new people. Primarily, it’s important to remember that our human brains are wired for survival, not friendliness and in ancient times a stranger coming into our village could mean danger. Our ancestors wouldn’t have lasted long if they automatically completely trusted every new person they ran across. Sometimes we feel like we might be bothering or annoying someone if we go up and introduce ourselves to them. Also, we’ve all had some bad experiences that stick in our mind and make us nervous about approaching people. The good news is, that we aren’t stuck with these feelings and behaviors. Once we understand them, we can accept them and use that knowledge to help us reach out to new people.

Meeting New People Tip #1: Other People Like Meeting You!

Our parents have all warned us about stranger danger. That’s a very safe and prudent attitude to take in the right situations. There are times when it just doesn’t make sense for us to start a conversation with someone new. The flip-side is that there are definitely times when it’s appropriate for us to say hello and make a new friend. It’s all about doing it in the right environment. Work functions, networking events or even a friend’s dinner party are all safe environments to reach out to new people. Even though you don’t personally know everyone there, they’ve all been vetted to some degree by the host. You shouldn’t have to worry about protecting yourself from physical danger. You’ll still feel a some anxiety that comes from millennia of human evolution, but you can work with it. Recognize it, accept it and tell yourself it’s okay to feel that way. You’re in a safe environment where everyone came to connect and share with other people. This technique won’t remove all of your nervousness, but you can practice it to make meeting new people easier.

Meeting New People Tip #2: You’re Not Bothering Anyone!

Some of us feel like we might be bothering or annoying someone if we just walk up to them and start talking. I can tell you that this is something that holds me back from introducing myself sometimes. There are a few tips we can use to help keep this fear from holding us back. First, at social events, most people have a purpose of meeting others just by being at the event. In a public place, like a coffee shop or library, most people expect at least some interaction with others. They will probably not tear your head off if you speak to them. In either case, we shouldn’t plan any specific expectation in mind other than politely introducing ourselves. It would be nice to get to know more about them, but it’s important to read the situation. If we are respectful and open when we introduce ourselves and they are too busy to talk, they will most likely very politely tell us just that. That’s a great cue to thank them for their time and walk away. If they have time to chat, even better. Again it’s important to read the situation, and that can be difficult at first. With experience and practice we can learn to read the verbal and non-verbal cues that tell us it’s time to politely exit.

Meeting New People Tip #3: Forget Those Bad Experiences!

Like many areas of life, we’ve all had bad experiences when introducing ourselves to other people. It’s unavoidable and it’s hard to let go of the memories. If these experiences didn’t bother us, we wouldn’t be human. The experience is not as important as our reaction to it and what we learn from it. When we feel these bad situations creeping up in our memory and giving us doubts, we can do a few things to keep us from retreating into our shell. First, tell yourself it’s okay to feel this way. Don’t worry about why you feel this way or if you should feel this way, just accept that you do. Now ask yourself, what did you learn from that experience and can it help you with what you’re about to do right now. If the answer is yes, is there a way to apply it to your next introduction. If the answer is no, give yourself some credit for doing some self-reflection and remind yourself that everyone is different. The person you are about to introduce yourself to is a completely different being than the one you had the bad experience with. There is no reason to expect that this interaction will turn out exactly the same way things have happened in the past. This is a new, unique situation. Don’t take away the chance of letting that new person get to know you because someone wasn’t so nice in the past.

Meeting New People: Going Forward

There are folks who are completely at ease meeting new people and then there’s the rest of us who get a little nervous about it. That doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with us or that it’s anything we should be ashamed of, it just means we need to accept that about ourselves and use the tools we have to help ourselves out. Human beings are social creatures and find relationships with others very rewarding on many levels and there are a lot of people out there who would love to get to know us. Understanding what makes us nervous about meeting new people leads us to clear actions that can help us take those first steps to introducing ourselves to someone new and starting a great new friendship.

One of our most important job as leaders is to train and educate the members of our team. This is challenging because everyone learns differently. Today we’re going to talk about the seven different learning styles and how you can apply your understanding of them to help your team grow to their full potential.

Learning Styles and How They Affect Your Team

One of our most important job as leaders is to train and educate the members of our team. This is challenging because everyone learns differently. Today we’re going to talk about the seven different learning styles and how you can apply your understanding of them to help your team grow to their full potential.

The Seven Learning Styles

The first of the seven learning styles is visual learning. Visual learners have a preference for using images, pictures, colors, and maps to organize information and communicate with others. They love to use whiteboards or other tools that let them explore their thoughts visually. You will hear them say things like, “Let’s look at it differently, I can’t quite picture it or Let’s draw a diagram or map.” Ways you can help visual learners are by Using color, layout, and spatial organization when talking with them, and using ‘visual words’ like see, picture, perspective, visual, and map.

Aural learners like to work with sound and music and have a good sense of pitch and rhythm. This can be helpful because music evokes strong emotions and aural learners can be tuned into the emotions of others. Aural learners often say things like “That sounds about right, That rings a bell or That’s music to my ears.” You can help aural learners by using sound, rhyme, and music when training them, Using sound recordings to provide a background and help them visualize and when creating mnemonics or acrostics, make the most of rhythm and rhyme, or set them to a jingle or part of a song.

Verbal learners find it easy to express themselves, both in writing and verbally. They enjoy playing on the meaning or sound of words, such as in tongue twisters, rhymes, limericks and the like. They know the meaning of many words, and regularly make an effort to find the meaning of new words. Phrases that verbal learners often say are, “Tell me word for word, The word you’re looking for is and Let me spell it out for you.” To reach verbal learners effectively, incorporate more speaking and writing in techniques. Encourage them to talk themselves through procedures or use recordings of content for repetition. Use rhyme and rhythm in your assertions where you can, and be sure to read important ones aloud. Mnemonics, acronyms and Scripting are powerful tools for verbal learners.

Physical learners use their body and sense of touch to learn about the world. They like sports and exercise, and other physical activities such as gardening or woodworking. Physical learners typically use larger hand gestures and other body language to communicate. They might use phrases like, “That feels right to me, That doesn’t sit right with me or My gut is telling me’”. To reach physical learners, Use physical objects as much as possible and Use role-playing to practice skills and behaviors.

Logical learners like using their brain for logical and mathematical reasoning. They recognize patterns easily, as well as connections between seemingly meaningless content. Logical learners typically work through problems and issues in a systematic way, and like to create procedures for future use. You might hear a logical learner say, “That’s logical, Follow the process, or There’s no pattern to this”. You can help logical learners by understanding the links between parts of a system.

Social Learners typically prefer learning in groups or to spend one-on-one time with a teacher. They heighten learning by bouncing thoughts off other people and listening to how they respond. Social learners often say things like, “Let’s work together on this.” “Let’s pull some people together to discuss.” Or, “Let’s explore our options.” Leaders can help these people learn by letting them work with others. Using tools like role-playing, mind maps and system diagrams are also useful.

Solitary learners prefer to work on problems by retreating to somewhere quiet and working through possible solutions. Sometimes they spend too much time trying to solve a problem by themselves when they could be more successful by talking to others. Solitary learners often say things like, “I’d like some time to think it over.” Or, “I’ll get back to you on that.”  You can help solitary learners by helping them set clear goals and objectives. Help guide them to align those goals with their values and personal beliefs.

Applying Learning Styles

A potential pitfall is making judgements about people based on their learning styles. It’s important not to assume that someone won’t be good at a certain task solely because of their learning style. We shouldn’t assume someone won’t be good at creating visuals for a presentation because they aren’t a visual learner. It is also dangerous to let others use their learning style as a crutch to avoid new situations. “I can’t take notes because I’m not verbal learner,” is not a true application of these learning styles.

The reality is that most people use a combination of the learning styles. Combining elements of each style can be helpful when working with a group of people. Pay attention to the styles that others use and to incorporate appropriate elements of those styles to communicate effectively. We got our information for this post from Learning Styles Online. Go check them out if you’d like to learn more. You can even take an assessment on their site to figure out what your own learning style is.

Challenging the status-quo often runs into cultural norms and perspectives that have been in place in the organization for a very long time. Asking our team to change the way they do things, where they sit, or who they work with is often like asking people to change their identity. This kind of change is understandable very difficult for most people. As leaders, we need to recognize just how difficult this is and compassionately lead our team through the changes ahead. When we see an area that needs improvement, asking a few key questions before making any changes can help determine if change is necessary and how to get our team through it.

Status-Quo – How to Keep it from Holding You Back

“That’s the way we’ve always done it.” I’ve fought against those words for most of my career.  As leaders we often want to improve our teams and keep them from being held back by outdated practices. I know how it feels to come up against the resistance from others when we see better ways of accomplishing our mission. When we challenge the status-quo, it’s usually because we want to make things better for our team, not worse. If this is really our primary interest in making a change, then it’s helpful for us to understand what causes this resistance and makes the status-quo so powerful.

Challenging the status-quo often runs into cultural norms and perspectives that have been in place in the organization for a very long time. Asking our team to change the way they do things, where they sit, or who they work with is often like asking people to change their identity. This kind of change is understandable very difficult for most people. As leaders, we need to recognize just how difficult this is and compassionately  lead our team through the changes ahead. When we see an area that needs improvement, asking a few key questions before making any changes can help determine if change is necessary and how to get our team through it.

Questions for Challenging the Status-Quo

  • “What if?” helps us to think about outcomes that might be better than the current outcomes
  • “Why?” helps us to identify challenges we may face as we try to bring about change 
  • “Who? Where? When? How?” help us put together details that will make the change a reality

It’s possible to answer these questions and decide that no changes to the status-quo are necessary at this time. Also, we could decide that the solution will create so much dissatisfaction that an alternate solution might be better. Change for the sake of change has destroyed many teams even though the intentions behind it were initially very good.

The take-home lesson today is that even though change is difficult for many people, as leaders, we can’t be afraid to challenge long-held ideas or practices that no longer serve our mission. We must approach change in a thoughtful and empathetic way to get the improvement we are looking for.

Many of us often feel like we are prisoners to some of the day-to-day aspects of our jobs. Almost every day, I find myself talking about how much time administrative tasks take away from the aspects of my business that really excite me. We know that as leaders we need to be delegating, not just to free up our time, but to develop our team members' leadership skills as well. Delegating is an important skill to have, but to do it effectively we need to be truly empowering others.

Empowering Others to Get Your Time Back

Many of us often feel like we are prisoners to some of the day-to-day aspects of our jobs. Almost every day, I find myself talking about how much time administrative tasks take away from the aspects of my business that really excite me. We know that as leaders we need to be delegating, not just to free up our time, but to develop our team members’ leadership skills as well. Delegating is an important skill to have, but to do it effectively we need to be truly empowering others.

Considerations Before Empowering Others

In order to empower others successfully, we need to think deliberately through a few questions before delegating. If we aren’t thorough about setting expectations, we might find that we’re spending more time supervising instead of focusing on the priorities we wanted to free time up for in the first place. Here are 6 questions we can ask ourselves before assigning priorities to one of our team members to help ensure that we’re freeing ourselves from the task and not creating an even bigger time sink:

  • What is the task, project or responsibility we want them to take on?
  • To what degree are we going to hold them accountable?
  • What resources will they need to accomplish the task?
  • What decisions are we willing to let them make on their own?
  • How much autonomy are we willing to give them?
  • How will we measure progress and success?

Trust is the Key to Empowering Others

It quickly becomes apparent that empowering others depends on trust. If we don’t know them well or trust is low, we’ll be reluctant to give them more autonomy and authority. If we have a strong relationship with them, we’ll be much more willing to let them run without a lot of supervision.

To reap the benefits of empowering others, we need to build trust with our team members from the very beginning. Waiting until we are task-saturated before delegating guarantees we’ll be spending more time supervising than focusing on more important priorities. Empowering a team member today starts freeing up our own time as well as builds strong leaders for the future.

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